Food.

Yesterday was Cranksgiving In June... A new version from friend Thomas (http://www.ypsivelo.org/) to compliment the traditional Cranksgiving I usually organize near the Thanksgiving time. Always a fun sort of event to spend one's money and time and effort for a good cause...

But this time, since I was riding instead of organizing, and it wasn't so much a timed race as it was a weight-hauling competition, it allowed for a certain amount of time for thought. From past Cranksgivings, and food donation sorting a Foodgatherers, I've come to an opinion on food donation, and I decided to compete for the pounds-per-dollar category... Basically, I want my donation dollar to go as far as possible, to provide as much food as possible.

And it really got me thinking. About what we are paying for when we buy food in this country. About how our food dollars are spent.

Not in the trendy Urban Agriculture/Locavore/Organic silliness that has taken over these days (something that advertising marketeers have co-opted to sell you more Tide and Twinkies and Toothpaste), but about basic sustenance. We're in this recession, and hundreds of thousands of people are losing jobs and houses and retirement savings and college funds and whole urban economies (Flint, MI anyone? Detroit?).

And so I'm in the Chinese Grocery store yesterday, calculating that this 20lb bag of rice at $10 is more food/dollar than the 20lb-er at $13, but at the same time, how many meals 20lbs of rice will provide. But then today, not 24 hours later I bought 4 bagels and a cup of coffee for $5 and change, and that's not even a meal, and it kind of made me a little bit sick to think about. And then I'm sitting here in Meijer waiting for a friend to finish shopping, watching a lot of Well-Fed Americans do things like buy 24-packs of bottled water and Mountain Dew. I'm kind of unsettled by this.

There's not exactly anything I can do about it to affect the opinions and habits of My Fellow Americans (aside from the usual blog post and such), but it's one of those things that just gets me thinking. About what we do, and how we spend money, and why we eat some of the crap that we eat, and the daylight between these moments of clarity (or best intention), and what seems to just happen.

MacAskill, Danny

If you haven't already seen this, you NEED to. Every minute is better than the previous.

It is no exaggeration to say that I watch it and get all choked up and weepy, and not just because that is some really really pretty riding. There's so much bike love going on right there, it's a beautiful thing.

USPDF

Seems I've had a change of heart...

I used to sneer at pole dancing. You know, wisecracks about parenting... that you can say you've been a good parent if, and only if, you've managed to, until they are 18: a) keep your kid from getting arrested/imprisoned, b) kept your kid from becoming a parent themselves, and c) keep them off The Pole.

As of today, I'm taking back that last one. Check this out... I think I'm going to start calling Pole Dancing as much of a sport as Rhythmic Gymnastics. If you're bored at the beginning, skip ahead to the last half - it gets more and more impressive. Oh, say... somewhere around 1:55 or 2:35 or 2:55.

(it's PG-13 for adult themes such as pole dancing, but there's no nudity, so I'm calling it "safe for work")

kapow-kapow

I'm not going to make any grand pronouncements (as I'm usually inclined to do) about this, but let it be known that I've had it just about "up to here" with white guys talking about how Obama is going to take away people's guns. About how "just you watch... the fascist state is right over the horizon. I'm going to be prepared when the revolution comes. Me and my guns."

Just so you know where I'm coming from: I'm an able-bodied, college-educated, straight-acting, adult, white male with a haircut and a clean shave. Among other things, I: am an Infidel, am an ex-Boy Scout who enjoyed earning Rifle Merit Badge, am pro-marriage-equality (marry as many consenting adults as you want), am anti-Affirmative-Action (it's socially/morally/politically intractable), am a supporter of gun rights AND gun control, love it when women are in power, don't believe in Global Warming(tm) but fervently believe that renewable energy sources are the only future, and dearly love nuclear power as a bridge technology to get us to where we need to go. There's more about me that you can ask, but hopefully that tells you which demographics I don't fall into (as I doubt there are any simple ones that I DO fall into).


So back to the gun thing and 'when the revolution comes...'

I'm worried that I'm going to have to defend myself against the crazies among the citizenry. That I'm going to have to take up arms against my oppressors, and that they will be my neighbors.

While they are metaphorically tweaking out about what the metaphorical police thugs are doing, I'm going have to metaphorically sneak up behind them and metaphorically pop a metaphorical cap in their metaphorical ass so that their crazy shit doesn't get me killed by accident.

Maybe it comes off better if I call it: Doctrine of Preemption. Because that's really what it boils down to, an arms race. A Cold War in our own backyards. Cuban Missile Crises in neighborhoods.

The end will not come because the Big Evil Federal Government destroyed the US of A in a fit of totalitarian fascism. The end will come because neighbor will be afraid of neighbor and we will tear each other apart in the process.

Constitutionally guaranteed freedom to royally fuck ourselves over. And you better fuck over your neighbor, unless they do it to you first.

---------------------------------------

So here's the funny thing from last week. As a group conversation turns to an episode of gun/Obama/we're-doomed-to-socialism banter, this one guy (who lives in a suburban white-bread neighborhood, and commutes to/works in a suburban white-bread neighborhood) tells a funny story about how... he has a CCW, and keeps a loaded gun in his car, but he sort of forgot, and this a friend borrowed his car, he said OK and handed over the keys, but forgot about the gun until the friend was miles down the road, and... gosh, isn't it funny that I had to call him and tell him not to freak out that there's a loaded gun in the car that he's driving, so don't go to Canada, don't speed, and if you get pulled over by the cops, well, this is why they have their guns drawn when they are talking to you.

Ha-ha-ha, isn't that funny. He Forgot That He Keeps A Loaded Gun In The Car.

On what planet is that responsible gun ownership?

Here's what I'm thinking... When The Revolution Comes, I know where I'm going to get myself a gun. There's this guy I know who keeps one in his car, and from time to time he sometimes even forgets that it's there. Seems like a pretty easy way to get my hands on one.

dang.

That's kinda messed up. So much for trying to help someone out. Goes to show... if you're thinking about helping out a stranger stranded on the side of the road, at 2:30am, watch your back.

Motivated Smiling

People who practice "intentional smiling" creep me out like you wouldn't believe...

Don't look at me to figure out what you're supposed to say, say what you mean, dammit. And when I don't smile back, don't assume that I'm angry, just because you expect your smile to be met with a smiling response from me. I might just be a non-smiling person. Deal honestly and explain your position instead of trying to persuade with your demeanor.

Facts, not feelings, folks. Learn to live with them.

Veggie Pets

There's all this over-inflated hoo-ha these days about gardens, "urban farmers", and all sorts of fluffy notions about how planting plants in your garden will save your food bill, the planet, and the children all at once. Me, I planted some tomatos in a pot, and it's like they're little veggie pets. "Bob" (seen here) seems to be doing well, though I'm inclined to rename him "Seymour". "Chuck", his upside-down cousin does not yet seem to be as ambitious, but he might be angry about the rough handling while getting repotted in the inverted orientation..

I'll have to add though, that since transferring the kale to the bed with the ground cover, the slugs that have started eating it are, in effect, eating a pet, and thus essentially attacking a family member. If any of those slugs are reading this blog, let it be known that you've been warned. That kale is a friend of mine. You better back the hell off.

More Eulexia

While my favorite use of eulexia used to be transmogrifying "god bless america" into " goat-blast a marigold", it seems that what's taking prominence these days is transmogrifying "buy american" in to "buy a merkin".

I'm doing the fancy-phone "MMS blogging from lunch", so I'll leave it as an exercise to the reader to find their way over to Wikipedia to find out what a merkin is.